Address: Town of Ainsley, 2127 Ayrsley Town Blvd #100, Charlotte, NC 28273
Casual
Last month my house was literally hit by a tornado, with me inside. I was sure at the time I did not receive any injuries, but looking back I may have been wrong. This is due to my revelation that only a head injury could explain how (in my humble opinion), an Italian from New York, could walk in and order a full meal from Portofino’s. I had successfully avoided going there, after over a year of living within walking distance of it, and having tried the food a few years earlier. The last meal I had was bad, on so many levels, that my taste buds wished they hadn’t made it out of the storm.
The Good: I enjoyed the bread. It was warm and chewy and did the best it could to cover up the taste of the meal.
The Bad: I think by the tone of the review you can tell there isn’t much I liked about this place, so let me start with the atmosphere. The area is extremely cramped, we were seated at a mini-both, which was barely big enough to fit our plates comfortably. Next came the service, it left a lot to be desired, to say our waitress was clueless (water, bread, utensils,etc), is generous. At one point, we asked her which of two entrée choices she liked better, she looked confused, then gave us answer that clearly demonstrated she had probably never eaten (or had any familiarity with) any of the food on the menu. Okay, might be understandable given that the menu is lengthy, which always opens the door to none of them being done well. (Jack of all trades…)
I ordered the house wine which was a mistake. I usually can drink any wine, their house Chianti, tasted like it came straight out of a box (or boot). I can give a long description as to why I didn’t like it, but that brings back too many memories.
The Ugly: The food; the entire meal minus the bread, was awful. Let me take it course by course: first, we ordered the calamari which is shown above. I usually don’t care for calamari due to excess breading, but in this case, it would have shielded me from the flavor of the squid. The dish tasted as if it was stolen from the retirement center at SeaWorld due to the lack of freshness. The texture was almost chalky and it was chewy, but not in a good way. To make matters worse they paired it with their terrible sauce. I am not sure which supermarket shelf that sauce came from, but I believe Aldi’s would even be ashamed to sell it…Unlucky for me my entire next dish was sauce based, their Chicken Parmigiana lunch (picture on top) was covered in their canned creation. Notice the watery sauce in the picture, it needed to be drained from the plate, because it made the breading extremly soggy. The texture of the chicken itself was also mushy, not sure if this is because it was over cooked or if it too sustained water damage. I tasted my wife’s stuffed shrimp appetizer which was slightly better, but that’s not saying much. Portofino’s then decided to add insult to injury, by charging $70 for this monstrosity. This must have been due to the wine/Prosecco we ordered, but with only three glasses between two people… I guess it added up. I may be harder than average on Italian places, but only because I grew up eating Italian food close to five times a week. That said, I still can’t image any circumstance where I would have enjoyed that meal.
The Verdict: 3.5 out of 10 – To be honest the verdict is generous for what I experienced…I gave it some credit for the pizza that was edible years ago, but that’s where my kindness ends. I do like Ayrsley, I believe that with some of the new additions they are improving the food scene a bit, but Portofino’s unfortunately drags down the average immensely. The images and tastes of the meal still linger, as mentioned I was in a Tornado the day before that lunch, and yet I still feel that biting into that chicken parmigiana was the most traumatic thing to happen in a great while..